Men accused of wrestling python outside McDonald's

Oh how many things could be wrong with one little headline? 

FOUR. I counted.

1. Wrestling python: I always thought wrestling involved arms and legs.  A python can't pin you down for the count of five.  He has no way to win this match....unless it's until death.  Then my money is on the python.

2. Accused: What more proof do you need than 50 horrified obese onlookers?

3. Men: As in there is more than one idiot doing this.

4. Outside McDonald's: Um hai, there are delicious cheeseburgers and fries in here or a giant python outside. That's when you know you have to check your priorities.   

Here's the actual article, which adds even more humor to the story because they actually stole the python before walking up to McDonald's and tag teaming it. That sounds wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong.  Which is why I'll leave it as-is. Because it makes me laugh and this is my blog. So I do what I want. When I want. Cuz I want.

XOXO,

Jaime

Dear God - I'm sorry?

Ever had a priest flirt with you?  I did last night and trust me, it’s definitely as double hawk [awkward] as it sounds.  My question is, does smiling back help me get into heaven or throw me on a fast train to hell? 

I mean a priest should have some pull with the big dude upstairs right?  But then another voice in my head just shouts, “He’s a PRIESSSST”.  Then another voice in my head would tell THAT voice, “But he started it”.  This debate continued the entire meeting with the priest, so I pretty much missed anything he said. 

I miss the simpler days of religion - when all it had to do with was money. 

XOXO,

Jaime Mac